You Say It's Your Birthday, It's My Birthday Too Yeah

What getting older taught me about connection in the digital age.

Taylor Swift gets hundreds of love notes every day. And he (yes he) loves it.

And I have found myself thinking of his story as my birthday approaches. As I've gotten older, what I love most isn't the presents or parties – it's those little moments when people pop up to say hi.

I’m talking about those folks who come out of nowhere to wish you well. Like the Facebook friends you haven’t talked to in ages who drop a quick “Hey man, happy birthday!” Or a random text from a nephew or cousin. Or someone at work who makes a point to brighten your day because they remembered it was your day. These tiny moments – maybe 30 seconds, a minute tops – where someone takes time out just to say, “Hey, I’m thinking about you.”

Which brings me to Taylor Swift.

No, not that Taylor Swift. Just a regular guy who happens to share her name. He made the news because fans mistakenly shower him with attention, thinking he’s... well... her.

But here's what stuck with me: when they asked him what it was like sharing a name with one of the biggest stars on the planet, I thought he'd say it was annoying or distracting, or something negative. Instead, he said it was actually pretty awesome.

Every day, he gets messages from fans – hundreds of people telling him he's amazing, talented, beautiful, smart, brave, fun – you name it.

He’s just a normal dude with a famous name. He wasn’t trying to catfish anyone. But he talked about how great it feels to start each day with random positivity, these well-wishes, this love. Just these little moments of connection that come out of nowhere.

Isn't that kind of beautiful? These tiny sparks of kindness that can light up your day?

Because here’s the thing about kindness – it doesn’t have to be big, grand gestures. A lot of the time, the smallest acknowledgment can mean everything.

And that’s why I’ve tried sending more of these little messages myself. I know that even a 30-second text might brighten someone’s day. I’m pretty diligent about wishing people a happy birthday or work anniversary, and I’ve become more intentional about noting special (or sad) occasions in people’s lives. When those days come around, I send a message just to say, “Hey, I’m thinking of you.” In a world where we’re supposedly more connected than ever, it’s funny how these brief moments can feel more genuine than a thousand likes on a post or a generic “congratulations” on LinkedIn.

Maybe it’s the intentionality that makes these moments special – someone choosing to pause, even briefly, to reach across the distance.

My Birthday Wish

So yes, my birthday’s coming up, but it’s not just my special day – it’s a reminder of all these connections, these invisible threads that tie us together. When people ask what I want for my birthday this year, my answer is simple: I want you to join me in making these connections stronger, one little moment at a time.

Here’s what I mean: don’t wait for birthdays or special occasions. Send that text. Share that memory. Let that friend know they crossed your mind. Your tiny spark of kindness might be the burst of light in someone’s day. It doesn’t take much time, just a bit of intention.

I’m even planning to build a “personal CRM” – like a Customer Relationship Manager but for friends and family – to help keep track of these relationships and moments (but that’s a story for another newsletter). For now, here are a few simple ways to make these connections part of your daily life:

• Create a “Spark File” in your notes app – When someone pops into your mind or you see something they’d love, write it down. It could be as simple as, “Tony loves sci-fi. Send him that article about new sci-fi movies.”

• Set up an “Important Dates” calendar – Not just birthdays. Add work anniversaries, kids’ milestones, even tough dates like, “Sarah’s dad passed away.” It’s a simple way to remember and honor the people in your life.

• Use waiting time wisely – Next time you’re in line somewhere, skip the doom-scrolling and send a quick “Hey, just thinking about you” text. Research shows small gestures like these can greatly reduce loneliness and boost well-being for both sender and receiver.

• Pick a day – Choose one day a week and set aside 20 minutes to email, text, or call someone in your life. A little goes a long way.

These moments don’t take much – just a pause, a thought, a quick message. But they ripple outward in ways we may never see.

Maybe that’s what the other Taylor Swift figured out – it’s not about fame or grand gestures. It’s about starting each day knowing someone out there is thinking of you. And sometimes, that’s all we really need.

Ever forward.
— Derek (aka Chief Rabbit)

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